25 Things I’ve Learned Turning 25

2026-03-26 - 08:41

Listen to the AI generated audio article. Your browser does not support the audio element. When I was 10, I thought that by 25 I’d have thousands of dollars in the bank and be starting a family of my own. Growing up felt like momentum, as if the faster I moved, the sooner everything meaningful would begin. There was always a quiet expectation that life should follow a particular timeline. I assumed adulthood would look like weekends spent stargazing, music festivals and concerts, confessions of love under the pouring rain, loyal friendships, endless travel, and casual but perfect hair buns. I’m now 25, and I’ve realized adulthood has turned out to be more about feeling weirdly proud of buying the cheaper brand of laundry detergent, wondering where all the missing container lids went, and checking the weather three times before leaving the house. Somewhere along the way, a successful day came to mean remembering to drink water, finding a good parking spot, and replying to emails before midnight. It’s an age when it suddenly seems like everyone around you is growing up very quickly. Socially, there’s often an expectation that by now you should be hitting certain adult milestones, which somehow makes you more serious, more established, and more certain about life. It’s considered the “right” time to get married, start thinking about children, pursue higher education, get promoted at work, or buy a fancy car and a house. But the truth is that everyone moves at their own pace. Life unfolds through hundreds of small choices made day after day, most of them quiet and unremarkable. The best we can do is choose the path that feels honest in the moment, the one that moves in rhythm with who we are becoming. And when I think about it that way, I realize I’ve done exactly what I was supposed to do: I’ve stayed true to myself. Here are 25 things life has taught me as I’ve reached my quarter-life crisis (in no particular order). 1. Not all friendships last a lifetime and that’s okay. Not everyone we connect with is meant to stay forever. Making friends in your twenties can be difficult because everyone is on a different path. People I once considered close friends have sometimes become strangers I no longer keep in touch with. I used to envy “inseparable” friend groups, but I’ve learned to let go instead of forcing what has faded. What matters isn’t frequency, but depth, the meaningful moments we share in sorrow, joy, and mutual support that come without expectations. We simply appreciate these friendships for as long as they last, and carry the love we have for those people even after our paths diverge. 2. Say “no” when you need to. As the eldest daughter, I’ve often struggled with disappointing people. I used to think saying no needed an explanation, like the character Jane in the movie “27 Dresses”. It doesn’t. Setting boundaries is uncomfortable, but necessary. Sometimes, standing by your values simply means saying no, and leaving it at that. 3. Rejection is redirection. Over the years, I’ve received my fair share of rejections from jobs, universities, and various programs. While I’ve also turned down opportunities, I’ve learned there is little value in taking it personally. What matters is what you take from it. If a door closes, you don’t wait for another to open, you build one yourself. Looking back, many of those rejections led me exactly where I needed to be. 4. Take things “bird by bird.” A very wise professor once introduced me toBird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Lifeby Anne Lamott. The idea is simple: when everything feels overwhelming, take it one small piece at a time. I have carried that advice with me ever since, and I passed it on to my own students. When everything feels too much, start small. 5. Grief is a friend. In my twenties, I lost both of my grandmothers. Their deaths were natural parts of life, yet grief still came in waves, in moments when their absence felt suddenly present again. Grief does not simply disappear; it comes and goes. I’ve learned not to ignore it, but to let it be felt. War brought another kind of grief: the loss of classmates, the collective trauma, the weight of unfinished lives. Different as they are, both ask the same thing—to be acknowledged. Now, I try to honor what I miss. Every year, on my grandmother’s birthday, our family gathers to make harissa, continuing a tradition she began. It’s how we remember her, by sharing stories and celebrating the life she lived. 6. Listen to people. I’ve learned to listen to my parents’ advice, wisdom and experiences, even when I don’t agree. There’s almost always something valuable in their words. Our parents are living life for the first time, too. They don’t have all the answers, but they want the best for us. Listening has helped me understand them better, and take forward lessons that resonate in my own way. 7. Don’t underestimate, don’t overestimate. Five years ago, I couldn’t imagine myself cooking, let alone not giving anyone food poisoning. Or hiking. Or climbing a mountain alone. Turns out, I could. These experiences taught me not to underestimate my abilities, while still maintaining a healthy respect for the challenge each new experience brings. 8. Vulnerability is a strength. At 12, I spoke at a school assembly and froze in front of the entire school. I promised myself I would never go on stage again. At 21, I gave a TEDx talk sharing my experience living with PCOS. I was nervous, but I chose to take ownership of my story and embrace my truth, especially because speaking about it openly had long been considered taboo. 9. Love comes in many forms. People love differently, but they love consistently. Love heals, sparks excitement and pushes you forward. Heartbreak is often unavoidable and one of life’s best teachers. It doesn’t last forever, but the lessons stay. Trusting someone with your heart is both a risk and a privilege. Life is too short to spend it with someone who does not love you as much as you love them. Material things are temporary and won’t bring lasting happiness, but having the right person by your side will. Take it from someone who has watched ten seasons of Love Is Blind on Netflix: reality TV may be dramatic, but love is definitely not blind. It takes awareness, effort, and courage to follow your heart. 10. Not knowing is okay. “I don’t know. Can you help me?” didn’t come easily to me. As a firstborn “know-it-all”, I felt like I should have the answers. I don’t. Three years of therapy taught me that asking for help isn’t weakness, it’s how you grow. There’s no shame in not knowing. 11. It’s never too late. You can take a step back. You can turn around. Not every journey needs to lead to a finish line. As a perfectionist, I’ve learned that admitting you chose the wrong door is better than staying in the wrong room. Give yourself grace, and remember that it’s never too late to choose a new path. 12. Admit when you’re wrong and apologize. When you make a mistake, own up to it and be honest. Internally, you might want to run away, hide, or dig yourself into a hole, scream, panic, or question yourself. Summon the courage to own it anyway. One sincere apology can mean a lot more to someone than a hundred excuses. 13. Embrace change. Try things you’ve never tried before. Comfort zones are not a great place to live. New experiences often teach you more than familiarity ever will. I left the comfort of my home and family to live on my own in a completely new place. Starting from scratch was overwhelming, but it taught me the value of stepping outside my comfort zone. Even if certain opportunities feel uncertain or scary, the smallest “yes” can lead to the biggest changes in your life. 14. Don’t compare your journey to anyone else. Comparison can steal your peace, especially in today’s world of constant social media. Keep some moments private; you don’t need to film or post every concert you attend, every meal you have, or every sunset you see. Let your work and effort speak for themselves. Focus on working hard and enjoying the present. 15. Stay true to your values. Don’t compromise what you believe in, and don’t let others dictate what’s right or wrong for you. People may offer advice or opinions, but they don’t know your full story. You can’t make everyone happy. If I had always followed what other people said, I would have been miserable. Staying true to my values has helped me make choices that feel right for me, even when they don’t align with everyone else’s expectations. Only you can decide who you want to be. 16. Forgive and let go. You won’t always get apologies or closure. Sometimes, you have to find it within yourself. I’ve forgiven people, not because they deserved it, but because I learned what I needed from the experience. Being the bigger person isn’t always easy, but holding onto pettiness or grudges only hurts you. Forgiveness allows you to move forward without carrying the weight of resentment. 17. Don’t rush. Let things unfold in their natural timing. Trying to force outcomes often leads to frustration, and sometimes things can even turn out worse. I’ve learned to practice patience, even with people who move more slowly than I would like. Experiences develop fully and meaningfully when given time. 18. You can’t change the past. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve looked back, gotten upset with myself at something I’ve done, and wished I could change it. But the camera is rolling. There’s no rewind button, no undo. You can’t unclick the shutter on a blurry shot, but you can take a new picture instead. 19. You will have cringe, awkward and weird moments. Trust me, if you haven’t accidentally waved at a stranger who wasn’t waving at you, tripped in public, said something stupid to your crush, or sent a text to the wrong person, are you even living? I’m extremely clumsy, and I’ve dropped things at the worst possible moments, moments I know will haunt me forever. Looking back, all I can do now is laugh at the chaos I’ve caused. 20. Trust your gut. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Maybe it’s the wrong pizza sauce, the wrong music, or the wrong color. Or maybe it’s something bigger, like realizing you’re with the wrong crowd. I’ve walked out of rooms where I felt uncomfortable or unsafe. It wasn’t always easy, and it sometimes felt awkward, but trusting my gut and removing myself from those situations was always the right choice. Standing up for my boundaries, even in small ways, has taught me to be assertive and listen to myself. Your gut often knows before your mind catches up. 21. Be kind. People carry heaviness we often can’t see. I’ve learned to choose kindness and to pass it on to someone who might need it more than I do. Kindness spreads when we choose to pay it forward. Sometimes, a small gesture, a smile, a kind word, or a hug is enough to change someone’s day. 22. Don’t reach burnout. Listen to your body. Take care of your health and pay attention to the signals it gives you. Make time for rest, get your annual checkups, and have your blood work done. Your health isn’t something you can take for granted, and caring for it should always be a priority. 23. Second chances are earned. The Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with gold known as Kintsugi doesn’t hide the cracks, instead the process highlights them, celebrating the object’s history and the beauty that comes from being broken and repaired. The same is true for people. Second chances aren’t given, they’re earned through honesty, accountability and the work of rebuilding. 24. Indecisiveness is, at times, okay. Sometimes you spend 30 minutes scrolling on Netflix while your food gets cold. Other times, you can’t decide what to have for dinner or what to order at a restaurant. And sometimes, you go to the store for eggs, but come back with everything but eggs. Not knowing what you want is part of figuring it out. 25. Laugh more. Humor is a powerful coping mechanism. While it may not solve every problem, it can make difficult moments easier to carry. I learned this from my dad, who somehow finds humor in almost any situation. I remember calling him at work in a panic to say I had lost mom at the grocery store. Without missing a beat, he replied, “About time something exciting happened!” His ability to find humor, even in stressful situations, taught me that sometimes laughter is exactly what we need to get through the moment. Comment Cover photo by Roubina Margossian. LIFESTYLE Contemplation March’s SALT issue, “Contemplation”, takes a reflective look at how we live, unwind and make sense of the world around us. From rethinking what fun means for a new generation and the quiet lessons of turning 25, to the liberating pull of rave culture as a space for self-expression, and the enduring realities of water scarcity in